The Drunk

Wonders why there have to be

Alcoholics and only alcoholics
Anymore. Even people who prefer

Chocolate to bourbon now
Find they are mere chocoholics,
And those randy desperadoes

Who used to pride themselves
On conquests are just sexoholics,
And visionaries are dreamoholics

And the god-besotted and monkish
Are irresponsible deioholics,
And those who eat meat and guns

As an alternative lifestyle to hope
Today are Apocalypholics,
And those who ignore the End

In favor of frocks, shopaholics,
And poets who actually prefer
Fooling around in a stuporous daze

With their verses to any other stupid
Thing they might do, for shame,
Are, well, something melancholic.