Surprise

"That I am what I am, and I am,
I am surprised"

I have failed
All the five monastic vows

I have failed
To forgive myself failures

I have failed
To forgive others' failures

I have failed
To mitigate misery

I have failed
To be more compassionate

I have failed
To be a good example

I have failed
To publish a worthy book

I have failed
To be collaborative

I have failed
To falsify a thesis

I have failed
To keep posted office hours

I have failed
Not to be afraid of pain

I have failed 
To avoid disagreements

I have failed
To choose hard over easy

I have failed
To go beyond pettiness

I have failed
To treat the land as holy
My body as a temple
My career as a calling
My students as my colleagues
My colleagues as family
My family as my friends

I have failed
To be the things one should be

I have failed
I am failing I will fail

I have not
Failed to know I am to be