Out on a borrowed back porch
Quiet conversation turns
To bears: how many have you
Seen so far this year? Have they
Done your gardens much damage?
One ate all the strawberries.
One wrecked half a root cellar.
No funds for relocation:
One or two will end up shot.
That sends talk to past bears,
Post mortem, the goat killer,
The carjacker, that one bear
Who could turn unlocked doorknobs,
The one who shit on a bed.
All too smart for their own good.
All soon dead. "It's sort of hard
When you see your problem bear
Draped in a tree for a nap,
Looking cute, but then they're at
Your windows on clawed hind paws,
And you know that this won't do."